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Welcome to my humble abode, come in and sit yourself down.
Dr Octopush and myself are very fond of visitors aren't we Dr O?
Make yourself at home and
I shall tell you all about my day.
Today
Dr O (my constant companion) has once again been a shining example for all our arthropodic friends. His knitting is of course legendary but yesterday he managed to outknit the whole of the WI. Luckily I had ten pounds on it and so we dined out at the Harvester last night to celebrate – what larks. People in grass houses shouldn’t throw phones and balaclavas are appropriate for all manner of criminal activities. Musings of SaturdayToday I have been thinking about the word gusset. It truly is a marvellous word. Gusset, gusset, gusset. I just never tire hearing it. Good Day Musings of FridayGood morning (or for some of you late risers, afternoon) I read this rather strange book last night on dealing with writer's block. It seems that some so called authors, have periods when they cannot think of anything to put down on paper, and panic that their career is over. The book suggested a number of exercises that could be performed in order to regain the flow of words, from brain to pen to paper. Utter rubbish of course. Plainly they are lazy or simply lack sufficient talent. I mean to say, look at all the nonsense I have written today, and I haven't even made a salient point yet. Dr O thinks they are trying to avoid the draft - I believe it is meant to be a pun. So today I advise that you go out and write something. Maybe a letter to your neighbour about their unruly dog, or a novel about farming techniques in the late 18th Century. Be creative. And use good grammar. Today Dr O warns against wearing moccasins in public. He worries me at times. Well off you go, I have writing to do. Musings of ThursdayMy apologies to you all. I have been so caught up in our building fiasco, that I have completely abandoned my flock of fashion gurus, and left them to wander the aisles of boutiques unarmed. Why just the other day I saw a man wearing fluorescent socks, and a girl wearing a skirt leaving nothing to the imagination. So let me help you back into the fold today with some wise words... A hand in the bird is worth, no that's not right...a hand in the bush in neither a borrower...no wait...Oh dear. Come quick Dr O, and bring me my pills Musings of WednesdayGood news everybody - we are saved. You see last night I had a phonecall from none other than Richard Branson - he of the facial hair fame. It seems that he has been much moved by our plight and would like to help us repair the old homestead. Being the business man he is, he has remoulded his Virgin Cola bottles to the shape of Dr O, and has given the profits to us. This really is marvellous news, because those chilly North Westerlies are playing havoc with my arthritis. So today support Mr Branson in all his endeavours, maybe buy some of that pickle he makes. Oh? He doesn't make it apparently. Still it is lovely though isn't it? Musings of TuesdayIn you come my children. Now I have a puzzle for you. Red sky at night Shepherd's delight, red sky in the morning Shepherd's warning. When I woke up it was black - what does it all mean. No matter how old you get there are some questions that simply can't be answered. Advice from Dr O this morning - avoid fungal infections by checking your tentacles regularly. Oh and he doesn't like micro skirts. He didn't say why. Musings of MondayCome in one and all, but please excuse my yawns, I'm very tired this morning. Some young fool was playing what I daresay passes for music these days very late and very loud and as such I didn't sleep a wink. This may be just as well because I've been having some rather unsettling dreams of late. A few nights ago I dreamt I was a honey pot of all things and I was gradually eaten away until I was an empty jar. Just what do you think that is that supposed to mean? Anyway enough of my disturbing problem and on to my daily advice. Don't play your music too loudly, get your eyes tested regularly (they are the only pair you've got) and long swishing coats will always catch the eye of the ladies.
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